If it's true that our species is alone in the universe, then I'd have to say the universe aimed rather low and settled for very little.
At a formal dinner party, the person nearest death should always be seated closest to the bathroom.
The other night I ate at a real nice family restaurant. Every table had an argument going.
Frisbeetarianism is the belief that when you die, your soul goes up on the roof and gets stuck.
Dusting is a good example of the futility of trying to put things right. As soon as you dust, the fact of your next dusting has already been established.
Most people work just hard enough not to get fired and get paid just enough money not to quit.