Eminem

Personally, I just think rap music is the best thing out there, period. If you look at my deck in my car radio, you're always going to find a hip-hop tape that's all I buy, that's all I live, that's all I listen to, that's all I love.

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Theodore Roosevelt

A man who has never gone to school may steal from a freight car but if he has a university education, he may steal the whole railroad.

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Erma Bombeck

Never have more children than you have car windows.

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George Bernard Shaw

What Englishman will give his mind to politics as long as he can afford to keep a motor car?

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Steve Jobs

Most people have no concept of how an automatic transmission works, yet they know how to drive a car. You don't have to study physics to understand the laws of motion to drive a car. You don't have to understand any of this stuff to use Macintosh.

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Mitch Hedberg

I know a lot about cars, man. I can look at any car's headlights and tell you exactly which way it's coming.

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Barack Obama

I miss Saturday morning, rolling out of bed, not shaving, getting into my car with my girls, driving to the supermarket, squeezing the fruit, getting my car washed, taking walks.

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Erma Bombeck

Never lend your car to anyone to whom you have given birth.

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Erma Bombeck

Marriage has no guarantees. If that's what you're looking for, go live with a car battery.

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Prince Philip

When a man opens a car door for his wife, it's either a new car or a new wife.

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Erma Bombeck

My kids always perceived the bathroom as a place where you wait it out until all the groceries are unloaded from the car.

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Steven Wright

I have an answering machine in my car. It says, I'm home now. But leave a message and I'll call when I'm out.

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Brian Tracy

Just as your car runs more smoothly and requires less energy to go faster and farther when the wheels are in perfect alignment, you perform better when your thoughts, feelings, emotions, goals, and values are in balance.

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Erma Bombeck

Onion rings in the car cushions do not improve with time.

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Erma Bombeck

It goes without saying that you should never have more children than you have car windows.

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Steven Wright

I had a friend who was a clown. When he died, all his friends went to the funeral in one car.

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Michael Jackson

I rememeber one time we were getting ready to go to South America and everything was packed up and in the car ready to go and I hid and I was crying because I really did not want to go, I wanted to play. I did not want to go.

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Rodney Dangerfield

My wife wants sex in the back of the car and she wants me to drive.

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Steven Wright

I play the harmonica. The only way I can play is if I get my car going really fast, and stick it out the window.

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Woody Allen

I have bad reflexes. I was once run over by a car being pushed by two guys.

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Tallulah Bankhead

(On seeing a former lover for the first time in years) I thought I told you to wait in the car.

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E. B. White

Everything in life is somewhere else, and you get there in a car.

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Mignon McLaughlin

A car is useless in New York, essential everywhere else. The same with good manners.

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David Suzuki

We're in a giant car heading towards a brick wall and everyone's arguing over where they're going to sit.

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Dave Barry

Dogs feel very strongly that they should always go with you in the car, in case the need should arise for them to bark violently at nothing right in your ear.

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Paul McCartney

When you first get money, you buy all these things so no one thinks you're mean, and you spread it around. You get a chauffeur and you find yourself thrown around the back of this car and you think, I was happier when I had my own little car! I could drive myself!

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Richard Dawkins

Design can never be an ultimate explanation for anything. It can only be a proximate explanation. A plane or a car is explained by a designer but that's because the designer himself, the engineer, is explained by natural selection.

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Rita Rudner

To attract men, I wear a perfume called 'New Car Interior.'

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Elayne Boosler

I am thankful the most important key in history was invented. It's not the key to your house, your car, your boat, your safety deposit box, your bike lock or your private community. It's the key to order, sanity, and peace of mind. The key is 'Delete.'

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Jackie Chan

American stuntmen are smart - they think about safety. When they do a jump in a car, they calculate everything: the speed, the distance... But in Hong Kong, we don't know how to count. Everything we do is a guess. If you've got the guts, you do it. All of my stuntmen have gotten hurt.

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Barbara Bush

It seems to me I spent my life in car pools, but you know, that's how I kept track of what was going on.

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Laurence J. Peter

Going to church doesn't make you any more a Christian than going to the garage makes you a car.

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Doug Coupland

Canadians can easily 'pass for American' as long as we don't accidentally use metric measurements or apologize when hit by a car.

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Ayrton Senna

And suddenly I realised that I was no longer driving the car consciously. I was driving it by a kind of instinct, only I was in a different dimension.

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Ayrton Senna

I was already on pole, then by half a second and then one second and I just kept going. Suddenly I was nearly two seconds faster than anybody else, including my team mate with the same car.

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Kim Kardashian

I know people think we drive around in these nice cars and we do whatever we want and our parents will pay our credit cards, but that's not the case. Sure, my parents were generous I got a nice car at 16, but at 18 I was cut off. I've worked really hard. I opened the store myself.

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Kim Kardashian

White is actually one of my favorite colors. I have a white car. I love white.

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Henny Youngman

My brother was a lifeguard in a car wash.

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Mindy Kaling

I think a lot of writers, male and female, write as if their parents were killed in a car accident when they were 2, and they have no one to hold accountable. And unfortunately, I don't have that. I have parents who I care about what they think.

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Dolly Parton

I'm gonna be making records anyway, even if I had to sell 'em out of the trunk of my car. I'm that kind of musician and singer.

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Martha Gellhorn

Why do people talk of the horrors of old age? It's great. I feel like a fine old car with the parts gradually wearing out, but I'm not complaining,... Those who find growing old terrible are people who haven't done what they wanted with their lives.

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Edward de Bono

Many highly intelligent people are poor thinkers. Many people of average intelligence are skilled thinkers. The power of a car is separate from the way the car is driven.

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Bo Bennett

If you think Abraham Lincoln became famous for inventing the town car, it is time to spend a few hours on history.

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Earl Wilson

If you think nobody cares if you're alive, try missing a couple of car payments.

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Dave Barry

I want a pit crew... I hate the procedure I currently have to go through when I have car problems.

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Sean Hampton

A dream without ambition is like a car without gas... you're not going anywhere.

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Doug Coupland

If God drives a car, He'd drive a 1973 Ford LTD Brougham sedan with a claret-colored vinyl roof, with oxblood leather upholstery and an opera window.

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Jack Kerouac

Whither goest thou, America, in thy shiny car in the night?

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Henny Youngman

I know a man who doesn't pay to have his trash taken out. How does he get rid of his trash? He gift wraps it, and puts in into an unlocked car.

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Dale Earnhardt

I don't want to argue with my wife about her car - or my driving.

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